Let Go of Shame

Let us fix our eyes on Jesus
the author and perfecter of our faith,
who for the joy set before him
endured the cross, scorning the shame.
Hebrews 12:2

Shame is that terrible, private feeling that something is wrong with us—that we are somehow defective as a person. That we are irreparably damaged. That if anyone really knew what we were like we would be rejected. Read more

Take Inventory

Search me, O God, and know my heart;
test me and know my anxious thoughts.
See if there is an offensive way in me,
and lead me in the way everlasting.
Psalm 139:25-26

Difficulties in life bring out the best in us. And the worst. This was certainly true of my experience with cancer. I prayed and practiced surrender and took in the love and support of others and of God. And I was resentful and jealous and reactive. Read more

Notice Your Reactivity

The fruit of the Spirit is love,
joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness,
faithfulness, gentleness and self control.
Galatians 5:22

The first responses I received when I told people about being diagnosed with cancer were usually responses of shock and compassion. I felt tenderness from most people. And I was soothed by that tenderness. Read more

Practice Surrender

Do not be anxious about anything,
but in everything, by prayer and petition,
with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.
And the peace of God,
which transcends all understanding,
will guard your hearts
and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Philippians 4: 6, 7

A few weeks after I was diagnosed with cancer, a music CD arrived in the mail from a friend. Several years earlier this friend had been told she had ovarian cancer and needed surgery. It turned out to be a false alarm, but she’d had a deeply significant spiritual experience through her ordeal. Read more

Pray

Trust in him at all times, O people;
pour out your hearts to him,
for God is our refuge.
Psalm 62:8

When we are faced with difficulties in life, we need support from friends and family. We also need God’s help. Perhaps the most direct way to open ourselves to God is through prayer. Read more

Take in Support

Two are better than one,
because they have good return for their work.
If one falls down,
his friend can help him up.
Ecclesiastes 4:9, 10

On the evening of September 11, 2001 my husband and I watched Gwen Ifill of PBS interview Mr. Rogers. Gwen was asking Mr. Rogers to give people advice about how to talk with their children about what had just happened. Read more

Feel What You Feel

Whoever humbles himself
like this little child
is the greatest in
the kingdom of heaven.
Matthew 18:4

After I was diagnosed with cancer I felt everything. I felt fear. I felt shock. I felt grief. I felt shame. I felt numbness. I felt resentment. I felt jealousy. I felt anger. I felt gratitude. I felt peace. These feelings seemed to come and go of their own volition. Read more

Gather Information

Listen to advice and accept instruction,
and in the end you will be wise.
Proverbs 19:20

Knowledge is power. That is what I was taught as a twenty year old nursing student. We learned to empower our patients wherever we worked by sharing information with them. Whether we were preparing people for a procedure, or for a surgery, or for having a baby, or for living with a chronic illness, one of our most important tasks was to educate people about what to expect, what choices they had, what was going on in their bodies, how to speak up for themselves, how to get support and how to take good care of themselves. Read more

Keep Breathing

The Lord God formed the man
from the dust of the ground
and breathed into his nostrils
the breath of life.
Genesis 2:7

Keep Breathing. These words stood in bold lettering on a card I gave a close friend. She had just received some painful news and was very distressed. She told me several days later that she carried that card with her everywhere she went so she would be reminded to take a few slow, deep breaths several times a day. Read more

Stay Grounded

The truth will set you free.
John 8: 23

Four days before Christmas in 2006 I had a phone appointment with my doctor. I was expecting to get the results of a breast biopsy that had been done a week earlier. At the time of the biopsy, I had been assured by the radiologist that everything looked normal, but as I sat down at the desk in my office and picked up the phone to call the doctor, adrenaline began pumping wildly through my body. Read more