Comments on: Seeing God in New Ways: Recovery from Distorted Images of God http://www.nacronline.com Thu, 19 Jan 2012 16:40:09 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.2.1 By: Religious Abuse - US Message Board - Political Discussion Forum http://www.nacronline.com/spirituality/recovery-from-distorted-images-of-god-seeing-god-in-new-ways-recovery-from-distorted-images-of-god/comment-page-1#comment-32512 Religious Abuse - US Message Board - Political Discussion Forum Thu, 13 Oct 2011 16:42:59 +0000 http://www.christiansurvivors.com/cri/nacr/wordpress/?page_id=142#comment-32512 [...] Isaiah describes is a God you would want to be close to, a God you could trust and love." Seeing God in New Ways: Recovery from Distorted Images of God : Natl. Assoc. for Christian Recovery __________________ "Human transformation requires the movement from fear to love. Presence [...] [...] Isaiah describes is a God you would want to be close to, a God you could trust and love." Seeing God in New Ways: Recovery from Distorted Images of God : Natl. Assoc. for Christian Recovery __________________ "Human transformation requires the movement from fear to love. Presence [...]

]]> By: Amy http://www.nacronline.com/spirituality/recovery-from-distorted-images-of-god-seeing-god-in-new-ways-recovery-from-distorted-images-of-god/comment-page-1#comment-27531 Amy Wed, 29 Jun 2011 17:18:07 +0000 http://www.christiansurvivors.com/cri/nacr/wordpress/?page_id=142#comment-27531 Thank you for this article! It speaks to the deeply set images of God, that I have and have been fighting for some time. My feelings of needing to constantly do more to gain God's approval even led me into following an internet bible-based cult, which affirmed this image and set it even deeper. I am still recovering from this cult experience, and this article has helped me to understand the root of the issues and the reason I feel this need to please God but never actually feeling like I have pleased Him. Our images of God affect so much of our lives, its really very important to understand them so we can heal from them. Thank you for this article! It speaks to the deeply set images of God, that I have and have been fighting for some time. My feelings of needing to constantly do more to gain God’s approval even led me into following an internet bible-based cult, which affirmed this image and set it even deeper. I am still recovering from this cult experience, and this article has helped me to understand the root of the issues and the reason I feel this need to please God but never actually feeling like I have pleased Him. Our images of God affect so much of our lives, its really very important to understand them so we can heal from them.

]]> By: Nelly Vergara-Mocoy http://www.nacronline.com/spirituality/recovery-from-distorted-images-of-god-seeing-god-in-new-ways-recovery-from-distorted-images-of-god/comment-page-1#comment-19618 Nelly Vergara-Mocoy Wed, 10 Nov 2010 04:02:25 +0000 http://www.christiansurvivors.com/cri/nacr/wordpress/?page_id=142#comment-19618 This is a very realistic presentation. We may not understand and feel the REAL presence of GOD because we have our own personal interpretations of our experiences oftentimes disregarding our inner woundedness and limitations. We may be blinded with our unfulfilled desires that we want in life yet we have to realize that God knows and Wills THE BEST for us. That God Loves us no matter what, though we may not understand His Ways at the moment, He just Wills what is BEST FOR US. Yes, this is not easy because it requires a constant struggles of purification so to realize and experience GOD'S REAL AND TRUE IMAGE AND NATURE in our lives. GOD SPEED... This is a very realistic presentation. We may not understand and feel the REAL presence of GOD because we have our own personal interpretations of our experiences oftentimes disregarding our inner woundedness and limitations. We may be blinded with our unfulfilled desires that we want in life yet we have to realize that God knows and Wills THE BEST for us. That God Loves us no matter what, though we may not understand His Ways at the moment, He just Wills what is BEST FOR US. Yes, this is not easy because it requires a constant struggles of purification so to realize and experience GOD’S REAL AND TRUE IMAGE AND NATURE in our lives. GOD SPEED…

]]> By: Karlo http://www.nacronline.com/spirituality/recovery-from-distorted-images-of-god-seeing-god-in-new-ways-recovery-from-distorted-images-of-god/comment-page-1#comment-16883 Karlo Wed, 14 Jul 2010 06:34:54 +0000 http://www.christiansurvivors.com/cri/nacr/wordpress/?page_id=142#comment-16883 Now ofcourse I am afraid that someone who was involved will read all this and come after me. Still struggling to break free from these distorted images of God and the people who helped create them can be frightful to say the least. Thank you for the wonderful information you provide, that even in the healing, there can still be struggles and that the healing takes time, sometimes longer than we think it should be. Now ofcourse I am afraid that someone who was involved will read all this and come after me. Still struggling to break free from these distorted images of God and the people who helped create them can be frightful to say the least. Thank you for the wonderful information you provide, that even in the healing, there can still be struggles and that the healing takes time, sometimes longer than we think it should be.

]]> By: Karlo http://www.nacronline.com/spirituality/recovery-from-distorted-images-of-god-seeing-god-in-new-ways-recovery-from-distorted-images-of-god/comment-page-1#comment-16882 Karlo Wed, 14 Jul 2010 05:37:16 +0000 http://www.christiansurvivors.com/cri/nacr/wordpress/?page_id=142#comment-16882 The process of simpley writing this response, looking at the whole picture from how I was feeling, to what happened, to where I am now by the end of the commentary.....I could see God again. This is just an example of how simple a process it can be, if you allow it. The process of simpley writing this response, looking at the whole picture from how I was feeling, to what happened, to where I am now by the end of the commentary…..I could see God again.
This is just an example of how simple a process it can be, if you allow it.

]]> By: Karlo http://www.nacronline.com/spirituality/recovery-from-distorted-images-of-god-seeing-god-in-new-ways-recovery-from-distorted-images-of-god/comment-page-1#comment-16881 Karlo Wed, 14 Jul 2010 05:34:21 +0000 http://www.christiansurvivors.com/cri/nacr/wordpress/?page_id=142#comment-16881 I'm not saying she was to blame, but her constant attack and harrassment, accusations and slandering certainly did not help. At this point (prior to the relapse of my old mentor), I was completely decieved, trusting everthing this woman said. I went to countless meetings outside of our Christ centered recovery meetings, was insistantly reminded that I was an alcoholic and always would be and that if I drank just one time, I might never make it back. I was no different then her. I was no better than her and if I thought God would deliver me instantly from my addiction I was crazy, because God just doesn't do that. If I wanted what she had, I'd have to get it the way she got it, by working the steps attending meetings and for the rest of my life always knowing I would have to attend meetings, no matter what.I would always have to depend on the 12 steps if I wanted to remain sober and that my "thinker was broken" In order for me to recover (as much as an alocoholic could, since I was never supposed to fully recover) I had to carry "this message" [of recovery] to other suffering alcoholics. Well, as God began to restore me and I did become sober (by the way,after a 3 day detox in the hospital I was completely delivered from the desire to use and have been sober almost 5 years) her controling became worse and my trust in her floundered. She continued to accuse me of using, telling me that I was not sober unless I was completely off of everything mood altering and anytime I decided to have an energy drink, she would refuse me any amount of time in sobriety. I was unwilling, I wasn't fully surrendered, I was egotistical, I wouldn't know Jesus if he were standing in front of me(this one usually came if I did not respond to a "Holy Ghost Lashing" she was giving me)I was not allowed to think for myself, that's why I had a sponser......This was minor compared to the other things she would tell me. Well, I fired her, but the problem got worse. I kept my distance from her, but after my origional mentors relapse, i fell back into her clutches and she became the new leader of our recovery program. As time passed and I began to see God for myself and so did she, but eventually the control got worse again.This time much worse, because I seemed to be outgrowing her. I met a God who loved me despite what she said, a God who cherished me, carried me, comforted me etc. I found this image of God in my pastor. Unfortunately, we became too close and when others began to see the closeness we shared, the blame was put on me. Jealousy ensued ontop of jealousy, now coming from his wife.I was completely unaware of any harm that was being done. I thought I was supposed to be close to him and he didn't keep any amount of distance.I thought it was ok. The fact that I was having marital problems and apparently so was he, was not an issue, nor was there any problem with him mentoring me. BOY WAS I WRONG! In time, others were whispering, rumors starting....I was completely floored at the stark revolation we were having an emotional affair. Nothing on his end to stop it, nothing on my end but conviction to flee from it.I still had no clue what was happening other than the urge to distance myself eotionally from him. As this ceased I began to focus more on my marriage, the pastor began to treat me differently, being more placid and ugly towards me, however he and his wife were counseling me and my husband. His wife became very controling an manipulative towards me. This was on and off until finally, he began working outside the church and his wife sort of took over Controling and concealing things. As you can imagine it got even worse. With this volitile mix it was like being at home all over again and in every single abusive relationship again. And the abuse came alive full force again. It still has not ended. My husband and I having reconciled our differences, finally left at the end of last year. I would go into how it all went down, but the point is, I was introduced to an image of God as a child, one that was haunting and terrible evil and controling distant and mean, met the real face of God as I understood Him, only to have him turn out to be the same rotten god of my youth. Thank goodness, he has shown me once again his true nature, to the degree I can understand it. But it took me reviewing my past and cutting out the source of the distortion, to see Him again. I’m not saying she was to blame, but her constant attack and harrassment, accusations and slandering certainly did not help.
At this point (prior to the relapse of my old mentor), I was completely decieved, trusting everthing this woman said. I went to countless meetings outside of our Christ centered recovery meetings, was insistantly reminded that I was an alcoholic and always would be and that if I drank just one time, I might never make it back. I was no different then her. I was no better than her and if I thought God would deliver me instantly from my addiction I was crazy, because God just doesn’t do that. If I wanted what she had, I’d have to get it the way she got it, by working the steps attending meetings and for the rest of my life always knowing I would have to attend meetings, no matter what.I would always have to depend on the 12 steps if I wanted to remain sober and that my “thinker was broken” In order for me to recover (as much as an alocoholic could, since I was never supposed to fully recover) I had to carry “this message” [of recovery] to other suffering alcoholics.
Well, as God began to restore me and I did become sober (by the way,after a 3 day detox in the hospital I was completely delivered from the desire to use and have been sober almost 5 years) her controling became worse and my trust in her floundered. She continued to accuse me of using, telling me that I was not sober unless I was completely off of everything mood altering and anytime I decided to have an energy drink, she would refuse me any amount of time in sobriety. I was unwilling, I wasn’t fully surrendered, I was egotistical, I wouldn’t know Jesus if he were standing in front of me(this one usually came if I did not respond to a “Holy Ghost Lashing” she was giving me)I was not allowed to think for myself, that’s why I had a sponser……This was minor compared to the other things she would tell me.
Well, I fired her, but the problem got worse. I kept my distance from her, but after my origional mentors relapse, i fell back into her clutches and she became the new leader of our recovery program.
As time passed and I began to see God for myself and so did she, but eventually the control got worse again.This time much worse, because I seemed to be outgrowing her. I met a God who loved me despite what she said, a God who cherished me, carried me, comforted me etc. I found this image of God in my pastor. Unfortunately, we became too close and when others began to see the closeness we shared, the blame was put on me. Jealousy ensued ontop of jealousy, now coming from his wife.I was completely unaware of any harm that was being done. I thought I was supposed to be close to him and he didn’t keep any amount of distance.I thought it was ok. The fact that I was having marital problems and apparently so was he, was not an issue, nor was there any problem with him mentoring me. BOY WAS I WRONG!
In time, others were whispering, rumors starting….I was completely floored at the stark revolation we were having an emotional affair. Nothing on his end to stop it, nothing on my end but conviction to flee from it.I still had no clue what was happening other than the urge to distance myself eotionally from him.
As this ceased I began to focus more on my marriage, the pastor began to treat me differently, being more placid and ugly towards me, however he and his wife were counseling me and my husband. His wife became very controling an manipulative towards me. This was on and off until finally, he began working outside the church and his wife sort of took over Controling and concealing things. As you can imagine it got even worse.
With this volitile mix it was like being at home all over again and in every single abusive relationship again. And the abuse came alive full force again. It still has not ended. My husband and I having reconciled our differences, finally left at the end of last year.
I would go into how it all went down, but the point is, I was introduced to an image of God as a child, one that was haunting and terrible evil and controling distant and mean, met the real face of God as I understood Him, only to have him turn out to be the same rotten god of my youth.
Thank goodness, he has shown me once again his true nature, to the degree I can understand it.
But it took me reviewing my past and cutting out the source of the distortion, to see Him again.

]]> By: Karlo http://www.nacronline.com/spirituality/recovery-from-distorted-images-of-god-seeing-god-in-new-ways-recovery-from-distorted-images-of-god/comment-page-1#comment-16880 Karlo Wed, 14 Jul 2010 04:38:06 +0000 http://www.christiansurvivors.com/cri/nacr/wordpress/?page_id=142#comment-16880 I am so deeply hurt and confused that I do not even know my God anymore. My rescent experience in a dysfunctional church family has shown me that God is uncaring, untrustworthy, manipulative and angry. He created me to make a fool of me and leave me vulnerable to those over me. He tells me to do things and then blames me for the outcome. He never loved me, but drew me in with kindness and compassion only to betray me. He looks at me as an emotional failure because I can't keep it together when someone hurts me or abuses me. This is the same "God" I knew as a child, growing up in a very dysfunctional home where my mother attempted to control and conceal everything from my father, and since he was away working or drinking or drunk at home, he was completely unaware of the pain and trauma in my life. Emotionally unavailable and had left me wide open for attacks from people, drugs, alcohol, sibling rivalry, abusive relationships etc. Recently, we left a church that was pastored by a very loving and compassionate man who had a key role in leading me to Christ. I was delivered from drugs, alcohol, painful emational memories of my family and had found a new and loving God and a new and loving family. However, that all changed. One of my recovery mentors was consistantly sought after and attacked by another member of our congregation.This woman, also in recovery was not happy with our "older sister's" approach to recovery. A silent rivalry began as she constantly conspired against this "older sister" of mine. Gossiping and slandering relentlessly, all the while, looking as though she was completely innocent. So innocent, that I began to trust her and not my mentor and eventually began following her as my sponser.I was torn between the two, back and forth, back and forth until finally I was hooked on the new girls brand of recovery. Very stringent,In the end she "won out" and old my mentor fell back into addiction. I I am so deeply hurt and confused that I do not even know my God anymore. My rescent experience in a dysfunctional church family has shown me that God is uncaring, untrustworthy, manipulative and angry. He created me to make a fool of me and leave me vulnerable to those over me. He tells me to do things and then blames me for the outcome. He never loved me, but drew me in with kindness and compassion only to betray me. He looks at me as an emotional failure because I can’t keep it together when someone hurts me or abuses me. This is the same “God” I knew as a child, growing up in a very dysfunctional home where my mother attempted to control and conceal everything from my father, and since he was away working or drinking or drunk at home, he was completely unaware of the pain and trauma in my life. Emotionally unavailable and had left me wide open for attacks from people, drugs, alcohol, sibling rivalry, abusive relationships etc.

Recently, we left a church that was pastored by a very loving and compassionate man who had a key role in leading me to Christ. I was delivered from drugs, alcohol, painful emational memories of my family and had found a new and loving God and a new and loving family.
However, that all changed. One of my recovery mentors was consistantly sought after and attacked by another member of our congregation.This woman, also in recovery was not happy with our “older sister’s” approach to recovery. A silent rivalry began as she constantly conspired against this “older sister” of mine. Gossiping and slandering relentlessly, all the while, looking as though she was completely innocent. So innocent, that I began to trust her and not my mentor and eventually began following her as my sponser.I was torn between the two, back and forth, back and forth until finally I was hooked on the new girls brand of recovery. Very stringent,In the end she “won out” and old my mentor fell back into addiction. I

]]> By: Jo http://www.nacronline.com/spirituality/recovery-from-distorted-images-of-god-seeing-god-in-new-ways-recovery-from-distorted-images-of-god/comment-page-1#comment-7606 Jo Tue, 18 Aug 2009 14:56:57 +0000 http://www.christiansurvivors.com/cri/nacr/wordpress/?page_id=142#comment-7606 Gods character is varied. It includes anger and wrath and it includes eternal punishment for those outside of His Kingdom. But we who belong to HIm need have no fear of punishment or judgement of sins. We stand as those who have never sinned because of Christ not because of us. I have struggled for two years now with a husband who truly does desire to serve and obey God but who takes this to a degree when 'dealing' with my sins that has caused me to doubt my salvation, doubt whether God would indeed save such a person as I, doubt whether God is being kind or is in truth playing cruel tricks on us all. This is far from healthy and i thank God He has so far kept me from allowing these thoughts to become the fullness of my relationship with Him. God is not angry towards His children. He lovingly disciplines us, but this is for our good just as parents discipline children for their good. He does not punish us. He punished Christ in our place. We who belong to Him no longer come to Him with a spirit of bondage or fear but we appraoch Him as Abba Father, boldy we approach the throne of God. His sceptre is always stretched out to us now because of Christ. And even towards those outside of His kingdom here and now He is patient and long suffereing not willing that any should perish. We are sinful fallen human beings and cannot begin to know the mind of God so far as eternal hell and heaven are concerned. We are commanded to trust in God and lean not on our own understanding and in this there is great peace and rest. But we do have to be ver cautious not to be led into any extremes for this is satans ploy. I have felt like a pendulum at times, swinging from one extreme to another, God being scary and cruel to God not caring about what we do in life. But the truth is those who love Him will have the desire to obey Him, and will be afforded the grace to do so in a measure given to them. But perfection is not attainable and we ought not to be demanding or expecting from ourselves or others a level of holiness that God has not given us the grace to achieve. He is far more merciful and patient and gracious towards us than we are towards one another. And these character traits He displays we are called to demonstrate to each other out of love. Gods character is varied. It includes anger and wrath and it includes eternal punishment for those outside of His Kingdom. But we who belong to HIm need have no fear of punishment or judgement of sins. We stand as those who have never sinned because of Christ not because of us. I have struggled for two years now with a husband who truly does desire to serve and obey God but who takes this to a degree when ‘dealing’ with my sins that has caused me to doubt my salvation, doubt whether God would indeed save such a person as I, doubt whether God is being kind or is in truth playing cruel tricks on us all. This is far from healthy and i thank God He has so far kept me from allowing these thoughts to become the fullness of my relationship with Him. God is not angry towards His children. He lovingly disciplines us, but this is for our good just as parents discipline children for their good. He does not punish us. He punished Christ in our place. We who belong to Him no longer come to Him with a spirit of bondage or fear but we appraoch Him as Abba Father, boldy we approach the throne of God. His sceptre is always stretched out to us now because of Christ. And even towards those outside of His kingdom here and now He is patient and long suffereing not willing that any should perish. We are sinful fallen human beings and cannot begin to know the mind of God so far as eternal hell and heaven are concerned. We are commanded to trust in God and lean not on our own understanding and in this there is great peace and rest. But we do have to be ver cautious not to be led into any extremes for this is satans ploy. I have felt like a pendulum at times, swinging from one extreme to another, God being scary and cruel to God not caring about what we do in life. But the truth is those who love Him will have the desire to obey Him, and will be afforded the grace to do so in a measure given to them. But perfection is not attainable and we ought not to be demanding or expecting from ourselves or others a level of holiness that God has not given us the grace to achieve. He is far more merciful and patient and gracious towards us than we are towards one another. And these character traits He displays we are called to demonstrate to each other out of love.

]]> By: Ministering to Abusive Families | Fuller Youth Institute http://www.nacronline.com/spirituality/recovery-from-distorted-images-of-god-seeing-god-in-new-ways-recovery-from-distorted-images-of-god/comment-page-1#comment-6739 Ministering to Abusive Families | Fuller Youth Institute Mon, 06 Jul 2009 17:14:27 +0000 http://www.christiansurvivors.com/cri/nacr/wordpress/?page_id=142#comment-6739 [...] 4(4), Oct 1974, 16-19. Also see The National Association for Christian Recovery’s web site:  http://www.nacronline.com/spirituality/recovery-from-distorted-images-of-god-seeing-god-in-new-ways-.... [↩]This diagram adapted from Dale Ryan, Pastoral Care and Abuse. [↩]Carmen Renee [...] [...] 4(4), Oct 1974, 16-19. Also see The National Association for Christian Recovery’s web site:  http://www.nacronline.com/spirituality/recovery-from-distorted-images-of-god-seeing-god-in-new-ways-…. [↩]This diagram adapted from Dale Ryan, Pastoral Care and Abuse. [↩]Carmen Renee [...]

]]> By: Robert http://www.nacronline.com/spirituality/recovery-from-distorted-images-of-god-seeing-god-in-new-ways-recovery-from-distorted-images-of-god/comment-page-1#comment-6361 Robert Mon, 15 Jun 2009 16:23:23 +0000 http://www.christiansurvivors.com/cri/nacr/wordpress/?page_id=142#comment-6361 As long as there is the teaching of eternal punishment, there will be spiritual abuse. No matter how hard you try, you cannot put a happy face on a god who burns people forever. As long as there is the teaching of eternal punishment, there will be spiritual abuse. No matter how hard you try, you cannot put a happy face on a god who burns people forever.

]]>