Friday 8th of December 2017
If only my anguish could be weighed and all my misery be placed on the scales.
It would surely outweigh the sand of the seas – no wonder my words have been
When we have lived for a long time by the ‘don’t talk’ rule, learning to
talk honestly and personally can be a real challenge. Our attempts to move
away from self-deceit toward honest self-disclosure may be quite awkward.
It’s not reasonable to expect ourselves to be gifted at telling the truth
when we have practiced deceit for so long. Sometimes our words will seem
startling. We will feel our pain, find our voice, and the words and emotions
will tumble out raw and uncensored. This text calls these ‘impetuous’ words.
Another translation of this text calls them ‘wild words’.
It is not easy to break the silence, to talk about what is real, to tell
the truth about what we see and hear, to share what we think and feel, to
tell our stories. Breaking the silence is like breaking the sound barrier
– sometimes it can be quite loud and it can rattle the walls a little. When
our misery feels like it ‘outweighs the sands of the sea,’ our emotions
are going to be intense and our words will sometimes be wild.
Wild words are part of the journey and should not surprise us. Intense feelings
sometimes need strong language in order to find true expression.
Lord, I am not accustomed to talking.
I am not gifted at honesty.
I have practiced ‘don’t talk’ for a long time.
And now I need to practice honesty.
Help me to be patient and accepting of my wild words.
Even when the wild words frighten me.
Help me to pursue the truth.
Give me the courage I need.
You, Lord, who created the worlds with a word,
Give me the words I need.
Copyright 2017 Dale and Juanita Ryan
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